Never underestimate the power of your word as a parent.
The things you say to and around your children are “programming,” for better or worse. If you tell a child that he or she “is” something enough, and they will start to believe it.
From the ages of 0-6, a child’s brain is in a state of “theta,” the same frequency the brain is in during hypnosis. They are downloading the program they are given.
Many parents are simply unaware of the power of their word.
“You’re so impatient.” It seems so benign. But the child’s brain will hear those words and download them as they are, especially if it’s repeated regularly. It will implant itself in the subconscious.
So rather, try to redirect with positivity.
“Being patient is hard — for me too! Can you help show me how to be patient while we wait for our food?”
Humbly and respectfully, make an effort today to become aware of what you tell your kids that they “are” and make sure they are all things you want them thinking about themselves. This includes things you say to others around them.
“He struggles with making friends” or “he’s just shy” are common ones I’ve heard (I am guilty of the latter!).
One thing I used to do with my first-born son is I would actually read the “program” I wanted him to have as I rubbed his back and he fell asleep. I wanted certain things deeply embedded in his subconscious.
“You are so loved.”
“You are so tough.”
“You can do hard things.”
Obviously, the program is up to you to create. But the first step is to become hyperaware of how your word is influencing your child.
I’d love to hear from you as you evaluate where you are with this.
Founder, High Value Dad